Dear Motor Vehicle Policy Enforcement Person,

Let’s make a deal.

I understand why Carleton requires students to register vehicles that they bring to campus. They have a limited number of parking spots, and so they limit who is able to register a vehicle. I also understand that they charge a registration fee of $50 a term. This seems a little steep for a town the size of Northfield, but I understand that you do this to limit the number of cars on campus, and even to deal with administrative costs, such as giving people parking stickers, and walking around fining people who do stupid things like park in front of fire hydrants.

After bringing my tin can to campus last term, I duly registered it. I paid the $50, got my little sticker, and affixed it to my vehicle as directed. I rarely parked my vehicle anywhere other than my assigned space. I was a good kid.

As it happens, my space is a garage. A garage next to my house. A garage with two spaces, and no vehicles in it other than mine. No one else in my house was bringing a vehicle, and you certainly weren’t going to assign the space to someone that lived in another house. So when I received a renewal reminder, I worried about passing my finals instead. My space was safe, my vehicle was hurting no one, and I figured the college wouldn’t really pay attention to the parking situation in my garage as long as there wasn’t supposed to be anyone in it. Plus, my vehicle already had a parking sticker on it anyway.

Today I got a little slip in the mail saying that I owe $25 for failing to re-register my vehicle. $25! That’s half the cost of just registering the darn thing. I’ve been trying to figure out what, exactly, I will be getting for that $75. I understand that you have enforcement costs. But really, I think there’s a better way.

I personally invite Security not to check my garage in the future. I’ll make you a deal. No fine, no registration, and you don’t have to walk the two blocks to my house every two weeks to discover that my car is still there. I’m willing to make sure that it doesn’t disappear from my own house, and I’m willing to suitably rebuke anyone else who parks there without permission. Non-violently. No harm, no foul.

Of course, I don’t want you to lose money on the costs associated with my vehicle. I offer to repay you in full for your costs this term, which in my calculation amounts to the cost of the paper on which you wrote up my ticket. I will be leaving a dime in your mailbox tomorrow. Thanks for your understanding.

Yours,
The owner of vehicle 0317

Posted on April 5th, 2006 by Lee
Tagged: College