To my neighbors who were barbecuing in my parking spot,

Sorry if I was a little terse yesterday when I pulled into the alley.  I didn’t mean to interrupt your barbecue session, I was just a little surprised to find my spot blocked by a charcoal grill and a group of people.

Generally speaking, I want to reward the consumption of grilled meats.  Please do not see my actions as contrary to that noble cause.  Also, please know that I only turned down the burger you offered to throw on the grill because I knew that my girlfriend was already cooking dinner.  I hope you continued to grill behind and/or next to my car, and that the perfect browning of your food was not in any way adversely impacted by the fact that you had to move your entire apparatus unexpectedly.

Although I did not realize it at the time I asked you to move, I now realize that you actually live in the house in front of my parking spot.  You do not, as I erroneously believed, live on the other side of the alley, and you’re not the group of people I saw playing beer pong outside last week in the early afternoon.  In light of this revelation, please disregard the snide nature of my request that you move.  In no way can I place you in the same league as the other obstructions I’ve faced, such as churchgoers’ cars, construction trucks, a randomly placed construction barrel, or a passed-out drunk.  Although I have technically paid for the use of this spot, I want you to know that I welcome any use of my spot that improves alley-sharing solidarity.

Next time you want to grill in my parking spot, give me a heads up and I’ll be happy to move my car.  And I hope I can still take a rain check on that burger.

Posted on August 4th, 2008 by Lee
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